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 RasJeph
Psycho Pete
Registered: 01/14/09
Posts: 11,657
Loc: Bumfuckt Egypt
Last seen: 1 year, 20 days
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 Benzo Scripts... 
#540905 - 03/28/11 06:28 AM (13 years, 7 months ago) |
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So, its taken me a while to admit it, but I have overwhelming social anxiety at times. Like, if I'm going with even a single friend to a party or something, I'm fine to meet new people. As long as I have the comfort of at least one person there I know, its ok.
But, its really holding me back from getting a new job. I currently work on and off for a friend as a roofer. The hours suck, I get paid under the table, and I only work when its convenient for both of us. Growing up sucks, and I really need to get a job with set hours so I can get some better money flow.
I've tried xanax and valium recreationally. Xanax just knocks me the fuck out, even from .25mg...so I know that really isn't going to help me. I'm not sure how I can explain that to a doctor without him thinking I'm just in there to grift him out of a controlled substance...
I'm going to explain the social anxiety to him, and hopefully he will give me something other than xanax. Is there anything I can specifically say to avoid that without letting on that I have tried them without a prescription and for recreational purposes?
I feel like a douchebag for even feeling like I need them for legit purposes...but I think it would make it so much easier for me.
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Of course it's happening inside your head.
Why should that mean it isn't real?
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 wishcouldeletethis
 
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 675
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 Re: Benzo Scripts... *DELETED* [Re: RasJeph]
#540907 - 03/28/11 06:55 AM (13 years, 7 months ago) |
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Post deleted by lampshadehelmetReason for deletion: k
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still beLIEve
State Property..Again
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,167
Loc: a world thats not my own
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Have you tried going to a psychologist before and talking to him? To try and find other ways, or the root of it?
I just say that because benzo script are a long slippery slope and I feel they just hide the root of the problem. If you do feel you need them maybe get an ssri? Benzos can just be so dangerous and when you stop taking them leave you in worse condition then when you started. Keep that in kind bud. Best of luck.
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niteowl said:
See, that term pedo gets thrown around a lot.
Is a 16 year old guy having sex w/a 16 year old girl a pedophile?
If not, then how is a 30 year old considered a pedophile for doing the same thing?
I think y'all need to look up the definition for pedophile.
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RasJeph
Psycho Pete
Registered: 01/14/09
Posts: 11,657
Loc: Bumfuckt Egypt
Last seen: 1 year, 20 days
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I'm not quite sure why...and I really can't afford to see any professionals to help me 
As far back as I can remember, I've always been nervous and anxious when I meet new people. I feel like it goes beyond just normal shyness. It sounds stupid, but if I know I'm going somewhere with all new people, I can't sleep. At all. I want to puke the whole day, and I try to avoid it as best as I can.
Makes me feel like a dipshit, because I know its something that shouldn't be so difficult, it just is.
Its not that I don't have friends. I have lots of people I'm friendly with and feel comfortable with, along with a handful of 10 or so people I've been friends with since elementary school, and we're all tight as fuck. Just something about meeting new people really bothers me and makes me unable to function. I dunno.
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Of course it's happening inside your head.
Why should that mean it isn't real?
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wishcouldeletethis
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 675
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Re: Benzo Scripts... *DELETED* [Re: RasJeph]
#540911 - 03/28/11 07:23 AM (13 years, 7 months ago) |
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Post deleted by lampshadehelmetReason for deletion: k
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Pandor
Registered: 10/01/10
Posts: 503
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Quote:
lampshadehelmet said:
Benzos are helpful during times of extreme worry, usually fear or heartache...
This.....
I feel for you because I have similar issues. I'm 31 now and I am much better then when I was younger.
When asking your doctor, instead of saying you have tried them on a recreational basis, tell them that it runs in your family and your mom has tried giving you some.
I take Xanax now only when I have a severe anxiety attack or when I can't sleep. You say it knocks you out, but sometimes that is exactly what I need. A good night's sleep. Especially when I am obsessing over something stupid.
When my husband moved away, and I was extremely lonely, I was taking it almost every night to sleep, and it's scary how quickly you can become dependent on it.
If you want or need therapy, that's up to you. I used to get my meds from an understanding family doctor.
Honestly, I am not using this as an excuse.....(because I love to smoke every day).....but the best medicine there is for this issue (at least in my case, and I have tried many meds) is medical marijuana.
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SpaceMonkey
Mind Pilot
Registered: 02/09/09
Posts: 3,471
Loc: Hawaiian Islands 
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
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Re: Benzo Scripts... [Re: Pandor]
#540997 - 03/28/11 02:21 PM (13 years, 7 months ago) |
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Hey Ras, we are on your side brah!
Mental Health services alot of the time can be provided to those without money. They have programs for his sort of thing. Dctor visits and meds can be provided through a medication assistance program. However, you need to go to a state run mental health facility. I do not mean an institution for the insane. But regular phychiatrist and. Psychologist.
Lampshade has givin some quality advice here along with Pandor. Don't be ashamed brah. Your only human! Pandor had a good way here to talk to your doc about the meds you want. I also suffer from social anxiety. Which makes it hard to go places.
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 Don't Mistake My Kindness For Weakness
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DungenessDank
Lord of the Flies
Registered: 05/05/08
Posts: 9,372
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 11 years, 6 months
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Re: Benzo Scripts... [Re: RasJeph]
#541051 - 03/28/11 04:01 PM (13 years, 7 months ago) |
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I feel like I've been given the curse of some sort of anxiety disorder at times. Its a lot like being on a long trip and riding out the waves of intensity to try to get back to baseline, while sober.
I think thats how I can handle my psys well, its just previous sober experiences that are very similar.
I hope you find something to help you my man. 
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RasJeph
Psycho Pete
Registered: 01/14/09
Posts: 11,657
Loc: Bumfuckt Egypt
Last seen: 1 year, 20 days
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Thanks for the reassuring words guys 
I figured some of you would have good advice, and it looks like you do. Now I've just gotta figure out what I can do.
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Of course it's happening inside your head.
Why should that mean it isn't real?
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Tangerines
Grease Wizard
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 9,497
Last seen: 6 years, 5 months
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Before you even think about going to the doc you should stop all drug use. Caffeine, alcohol, pot, heroin, meth, coke, you get the picture. Just press pause on the bullshit. Try focusing your head. Not going around or ignoring the anxiety. In the words of Del "if you try to go over you're gonna go under." Well whatever the hell that means. Just focus. I remember getting in these "fits" here and there. It's hard to focus it seems with this plastic life full of all sorts of bullshit going on. Distractions. Whatever you want to call it.
Of course if you are that crazy where all options have been exhausted prior to relying on artificial stimuli then go ahead and pop the pill and get through life. We all gotta get through life.
A lot of the times I find that deep in the folds of my seemingly chaotic head is something eating at me causing these problems. Could be any sort of problems.
I only wrote this out for you because I like ya.
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RasJeph
Psycho Pete
Registered: 01/14/09
Posts: 11,657
Loc: Bumfuckt Egypt
Last seen: 1 year, 20 days
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Re: Benzo Scripts... [Re: Tangerines]
#541092 - 03/28/11 05:06 PM (13 years, 7 months ago) |
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I appreciate that. Like I mentioned, I've been living my entire life with this problem. Including when I was really young (sober).
Its rarely overwhelming, because I'm rarely in situations where it is a problem. I almost ALWAYS have someone nearby that I know, so I don't usually feel the extremes of panic.
I just talked about it with my mom (feel free to laugh) and I guess the state passed a new law that says I can remain on her insurance until I'm 26...so, I guess that opens up my possibilities.
I feel like once I'm accustomed to my job and meet the people I'll be spending most of my time with, I won't need the medication to help. Its certainly not something I'd take on a daily basis - I really don't feel the pressure or like I need it daily.
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Of course it's happening inside your head.
Why should that mean it isn't real?
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Pandor
Registered: 10/01/10
Posts: 503
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Re: Benzo Scripts... [Re: Tangerines]
#541095 - 03/28/11 05:11 PM (13 years, 7 months ago) |
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On a side note, caffeine is the worst drug IMO. I have had headaches and withdraw symptoms worse then any other drug. We use it every day and do not realize how addictive it is.
I avoid it. I allow myself one or maximum 2 drinks a day with it, but usually I go days with out it. It made a huge difference with controlling and understanding my anxiety when a part of it was caffeine addiction.
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RasJeph
Psycho Pete
Registered: 01/14/09
Posts: 11,657
Loc: Bumfuckt Egypt
Last seen: 1 year, 20 days
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Re: Benzo Scripts... [Re: Pandor]
#541108 - 03/28/11 05:29 PM (13 years, 7 months ago) |
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I hadn't had more than tea in the past like 3 years up until I started using that damn K-Cup machine and making coffee a few weeks ago.
Certainly not a daily for me. Maybe weekly. Probably bi-weekly 
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Of course it's happening inside your head.
Why should that mean it isn't real?
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Big_tiggy
Registered: 05/07/08
Posts: 1,178
Loc: Neither here nor there
Last seen: 12 years, 7 months
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Re: Benzo Scripts... [Re: RasJeph]
#541206 - 03/29/11 07:24 AM (13 years, 7 months ago) |
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I was recently on a ativan and then kolonopin script, then I realized I dont reallly need them that bad and all that anxiety stemmed from thoughts in my head that wern't actually true, I know what you mean though at work it can get hectic, I sugget you dont get on the pills but if you ever get an anxiety attack just talk to your boss and tell him what happens and how you feel and ask for a moment to breathe, I'm a roofer too and the best thing is a water and ciggarette break and then just tell yourself anything you might think will motivate yo to keep going, turn that anxiety into raw power and fuck that roof up
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drawde
Registered: 11/15/09
Posts: 5,268
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Re: Benzo Scripts... [Re: RasJeph]
#541207 - 03/29/11 07:38 AM (13 years, 7 months ago) |
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The less I give a fuck about what people think of me the lesser my anxiety becomes.
Its liberating, really.
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King Koopa said:
The amount of pot that Gask smokes is equivalent to a guy shooting heroin on weekends
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RasJeph
Psycho Pete
Registered: 01/14/09
Posts: 11,657
Loc: Bumfuckt Egypt
Last seen: 1 year, 20 days
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Re: Benzo Scripts... [Re: drawde]
#541215 - 03/29/11 09:02 AM (13 years, 7 months ago) |
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Honestly, I usually don't give a fuck what people think. Probably about 99% of the time. But, like I said, if I'm going to be forced to work with these people, I have to probably not be the asshole I usually am, at least until I know them 
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Of course it's happening inside your head.
Why should that mean it isn't real?
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Pandor
Registered: 10/01/10
Posts: 503
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Re: Benzo Scripts... [Re: RasJeph]
#541252 - 03/29/11 12:23 PM (13 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
drawde said:
The less I give a fuck about what people think of me the lesser my anxiety becomes.
Its liberating, really.
this is true for me too
Quote:
RasJeph said:
Honestly, I usually don't give a fuck what people think. Probably about 99% of the time. But, like I said, if I'm going to be forced to work with these people, I have to probably not be the asshole I usually am, at least until I know them
Not saying it's right, but it works for me, I'm just the opposite. When I first meet people, I don't bother. As I interact with them more and find them to cool, I lay off the being a bitch. I don't do your kind of work, but in my life time, I've noticed that you need to deal with the most ass holes at whatever job you have, especially coworkers. It's not worth it trying to impress them or worrying about what they think because most of them are going to talk about you behind your back to each other regardless.
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Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 10 years, 5 months
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Quote:
lampshadehelmet said:
I find that not all benzo's are the same and klonopin doesn't tend to make me sleepy like valium/xanax, as well it lasts the longest.
I take kpins now, they are great at their job.
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RasJeph
Psycho Pete
Registered: 01/14/09
Posts: 11,657
Loc: Bumfuckt Egypt
Last seen: 1 year, 20 days
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Re: Benzo Scripts... [Re: Picklez]
#541386 - 03/29/11 06:26 PM (13 years, 7 months ago) |
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I've done a few different benzies recreationally, and the only one I found even mildly enjoyable was valium. Even that didn't really give me euphoria. Just chilled me out. Thats a month of my life I don't remember though.
I remember the day I got my valium in the mail, and then I remember the last day I had it. Everything between is a loss.
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Of course it's happening inside your head.
Why should that mean it isn't real?
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Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 10 years, 5 months
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Re: Benzo Scripts... [Re: RasJeph]
#541475 - 03/29/11 10:25 PM (13 years, 7 months ago) |
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xanax is my fav recreaionally, but kpins do me just fine.
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SpaceMonkey
Mind Pilot
Registered: 02/09/09
Posts: 3,471
Loc: Hawaiian Islands
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
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Re: Benzo Scripts... [Re: Picklez]
#541499 - 03/29/11 11:08 PM (13 years, 7 months ago) |
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Kpins, are a trip recreationally speaking. I had a script one time of both .5's and the 1 mg. Got 60 of the 1mg. And 30 of the .5 mg. Was supposed to take 1 mg in da morning and evening and a .5 in the afternoon. Hahahahaha, right!
I would eat both scripts within 5 days! Most times I went fishing for 5 days. But man, the amnesia was crazy! While I had them scripts, I do not remember them first 5 days after refill time. I did some crazy stupid stuff on them. No inhabition at all! (I hope that was the word, im kinda stoned and a lil buzzed from beers) I do remember some things like walking home at 2 am after I run my car into a snow bank. And not having any balance. Or even the time I almost drown trying to cross a river I was fishing.
Valuum too mix with alcohol was quite a combo too. Phew, lost a few days on them as well. However that is a deadly combo from what I read.
Ativan seems to be the drug doctors are giving out now a days. The last 2 times I needed anti anxiety meds, that is what I got.
Just becareful with benzo's! the addictions from what I hear is rough! But do work there job if used properly.
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Don't Mistake My Kindness For Weakness
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Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 10 years, 5 months
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Re: Benzo Scripts... [Re: SpaceMonkey]
#541501 - 03/29/11 11:10 PM (13 years, 7 months ago) |
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yeah i get 120 at a time, every 3 weeks. i love it. got more benzos than i know what to do with
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mushhead91
Truth Seeker
Registered: 02/08/11
Posts: 199
Last seen: 11 years, 5 months
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Re: Benzo Scripts... [Re: Picklez]
#541558 - 03/30/11 05:53 AM (13 years, 7 months ago) |
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Yeah I was put on 0.5mg kpins and 40mg Paxil for my anxiety disorder. Has helped out a ton, and makes me alot less paranoid and anxious when I smoke weed or do other activities that used to trigger anxiety for me.
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Pandor
Registered: 10/01/10
Posts: 503
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Re: Benzo Scripts... [Re: mushhead91]
#541690 - 03/30/11 01:25 PM (13 years, 7 months ago) |
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I think it's so strange that weed actually triggers anxiety in some people. I used to get that way too, and now it's the complete opposite. If I am anxious and I smoke, I am much better off. Even if it includes going out in public.
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Picklez
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 17,919
Last seen: 10 years, 5 months
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Re: Benzo Scripts... [Re: Pandor]
#542085 - 04/01/11 05:27 AM (13 years, 7 months ago) |
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Ive never been a fan of getting stoned in public, I dont know why. I have no problem getting drunk or all kpin'd out but weed makes me paranoid.
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