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 ziggystardust
Stranger
Registered: 06/16/09
Posts: 13
Last seen: 15 years, 20 days
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 My story: am I ready for weed again? 
#379214 - 03/06/10 06:28 PM (15 years, 1 month ago) |
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Hey all,
To understand my situation a bit of backstory is needed.
I started smoking marijuana at the beginning of last year. I smoked it consistently, and I loved it. It helped me creatively and made me much more relaxed in life.
Then, something terrible happened. My sister passed away, shaking my family to its core. I decided to stop smoking during this difficult time. The trauma of the incident started affecting my work at university and pretty soon I was failing. I lost my innocence. I was on the edge.
I hadn't smoked marijuana in a few weeks when I decided to smoke up. I brought some really sticky shit home, and took some hearty pipe hits. I was home alone at the time. The high hit me more strongly than I had anticipated. I started to have persistent, self-deprecating thoughts. I wandered the house in a haze. Then, I started to feel as though I was going insane. I panicked; I thought I had lost it. It was terrifying.
It may be important to note I also had a freaky shroom trip around this time.
I tried smoking weed a few times after that. Sometimes I was fine, but for the most part I would start to feel like I was going crazy again. I stopped.
Then, these panic attacks trickled through into sober life. One night at the comedy club before going on stage I got that familiar shift of perception into insanity and I wondered if I would ever be normal again.
My therapist told me that what I was experiencing were anxiety attacks, and that I was actually completely sane. With this knowledge, the anxiety attacks stopped. Slowly, the anxiety is leaving my life. I'm attending a full-time course and I am happy. The only thing is, I miss marijuana a lot.
I've been doing some reading on the internet. Apparently, the fragrant, potent sativa strain (which I smoked on that night) is higher in the psychoactive THC than the anxiety-relieving Cannabidiol (CBD), while dark, schwagy indica strains have more CBD, and so they make for a much more relaxing smoke as opposed to a buzzy head high.
I'm thinking maybe if I can track down some indica (although I don't see it a lot over here) it may actually relieve my anxiety rather than aggravate it and cause another attack.
I love marijuana, and I want it in my life again. But I don't want to trigger the anxiety again. I do think it's more about frame of mind than the drug's effect though. Thoughts?
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Homosapian
DMT
Registered: 12/25/09
Posts: 484
Loc: Austin , TX
Last seen: 14 years, 8 months
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Re: My story: am I ready for weed again? [Re: ziggystardust]
#379221 - 03/06/10 06:36 PM (15 years, 1 month ago) |
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do you mind me asking how did your sister past?
you can always buy DANK indicas... all kushs are indica.
and they have the same amount of THC as sativas.
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 Ben18
Drunk Derelict
Registered: 04/22/08
Posts: 3,189
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Re: My story: am I ready for weed again? [Re: ziggystardust]
#379222 - 03/06/10 06:37 PM (15 years, 1 month ago) |
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i say
one hit can change a life
so start there?
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FarBeyondDriven
Truthfully, I'm a bullshitter
Registered: 04/22/08
Posts: 13,834
Loc: Greenbow, Alabama
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Re: My story: am I ready for weed again? [Re: ziggystardust]
#379286 - 03/06/10 09:25 PM (15 years, 1 month ago) |
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Find an indica and start slow. Couple hits and go from there because your tolerance is so low. Ease back into it and you should be fine I would think.  
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ttotheh
european son
Registered: 05/13/09
Posts: 2,135
Loc: new york state 
Last seen: 12 years, 10 months
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Re: My story: am I ready for weed again? [Re: ziggystardust]
#379302 - 03/06/10 10:43 PM (15 years, 1 month ago) |
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do u live in a state with medical mj im almost 100% sure u can get prescribed pot for anxiety anyway if you are you can grow your own indica strain or just buy it from the dispensery
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I live with thirteen dead cats ,
a purple dog that wears spats,
they all live out in the hall,
and i cant stand it anymore
anything i say on this website is 100 % false
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headyeddie
Cool Dude In A Loose Mood
Registered: 03/29/09
Posts: 239
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Re: My story: am I ready for weed again? [Re: ziggystardust]
#379336 - 03/07/10 03:50 AM (15 years, 1 month ago) |
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I agree with FBD. (especially if you have no/low tolerance and get decent herb) I would start slow, similar situation happened with me. I didn't trip for a while and never fully quit smoking but definitely cut back and started self treating my anxiety with benzos then eventually fazed those out and now me and MJ are good friends again 
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coda
Registered: 04/20/08
Posts: 4,736
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Re: My story: am I ready for weed again? [Re: headyeddie]
#379432 - 03/07/10 11:28 AM (15 years, 1 month ago) |
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also keep in mind that some people are SUPER sensitive when it comes to cannabis. My girlfriend can only take tiny tiny hits, even then she finds the effects to be too overpowering and unenjoyable. She's like you and gets crazy anxiety attacks and undesirable thoughts.
If I were you I would measure you doses out. Instead of packing a full bowl, pack a solid hit. Toke the hit, then put the pipe down for at least a 1/2 hour. Find out where that one hit takes you, if it puts in the place you want to be there is NO need to smoke more! Just find that balance and you'll find the dose you need to be able to relax and enjoy the bud. You might be surprised at how well a single hit of good bud can get you high. There have been plenty of strains I smoked where one or bong hits is all I need and I'm a seasoned smoker, everyone has their limits so you just need to find yours 
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MFDoom666: sobriety kills my buzz every time.
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SmOakland
Now with Grow!
Registered: 05/31/09
Posts: 2,662
Loc: Oaktown to NOLA
Last seen: 4 years, 7 months
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Re: My story: am I ready for weed again? [Re: coda]
#379436 - 03/07/10 11:35 AM (15 years, 1 month ago) |
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Welcome to growery ZiggyStar. Sounds like you are going through some hard shit. I would stay off any hallucinogens (especially shrooms) until your emotional state turns around. Good luck brotha.
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SpaceMonkey
Mind Pilot
Registered: 02/09/09
Posts: 3,471
Loc: Hawaiian Islands
Last seen: 4 years, 7 months
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Re: My story: am I ready for weed again? [Re: ziggystardust]
#379486 - 03/07/10 01:30 PM (15 years, 1 month ago) |
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ziggystardust, Welcome to Our Growery!
Sorry to hear about your loss!! Loosing a family member is very hard for sure.
You have gotten some pretty solid advice here to your question. I think all of us cannabis smokers have felt what you describe. I know i do with long sobriety breaks. The first time i smoke after a long break gets me all paranoid and anxious. Just have to start slow and work into it. After these effects subside it is a smooth ride. Research some medical strains that do not produce these undesired effects. Strains for anxiety.
Hope things get better for ya soon Ziggy!
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 Don't Mistake My Kindness For Weakness
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FarBeyondDriven
Truthfully, I'm a bullshitter
Registered: 04/22/08
Posts: 13,834
Loc: Greenbow, Alabama
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Re: My story: am I ready for weed again? [Re: coda]
#379502 - 03/07/10 02:02 PM (15 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
coda said:
also keep in mind that some people are SUPER sensitive when it comes to cannabis. My girlfriend can only take tiny tiny hits, even then she finds the effects to be too overpowering and unenjoyable. She's like you and gets crazy anxiety attacks and undesirable thoughts.
If I were you I would measure you doses out. Instead of packing a full bowl, pack a solid hit. Toke the hit, then put the pipe down for at least a 1/2 hour. Find out where that one hit takes you, if it puts in the place you want to be there is NO need to smoke more! Just find that balance and you'll find the dose you need to be able to relax and enjoy the bud. You might be surprised at how well a single hit of good bud can get you high. There have been plenty of strains I smoked where one or bong hits is all I need and I'm a seasoned smoker, everyone has their limits so you just need to find yours
That's what it's all about. not everyone has to smoke 3g 
I used to smoke weed until all of it was gone when I was younger, but nowadays I seem to enjoy it more with just a good buzz throughout the day 
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RasJeph
Psycho Pete
Registered: 01/14/09
Posts: 11,657
Loc: Bumfuckt Egypt
Last seen: 1 year, 5 months
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Re: My story: am I ready for weed again? [Re: FarBeyondDriven]
#379535 - 03/07/10 03:38 PM (15 years, 1 month ago) |
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I have some advice.
I smoked a lot...I mean a lot. Maybe like and 8th a day for 3 months (might not be a lot to some of these guys lol)
I ended up taking a break, because I was real low on cash. I waited a few months before I smoked.
Then, I got the same shitty experience you did.
I had it a lot, and I wanted to never smoke again. Then, one day, I sat down and said "fuck it." and just smoked and smoked and smoked. I was OK again.
I think you just need to raise your tolerance back up. It was real shitty for me the first few times, but now its OK again. I think thats what happens to most people who feel like this. Know, you aren't alone in that.
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Of course it's happening inside your head.
Why should that mean it isn't real?
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Farmer Joe
Registered: 09/03/09
Posts: 1,707
Loc: USA
Last seen: 2 years, 4 months
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Re: My story: am I ready for weed again? [Re: RasJeph]
#379539 - 03/07/10 03:54 PM (15 years, 1 month ago) |
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coda threw out some sound advice.
Just take lil rips until you reach your comfortable state.
I quit for around 10-12 months roughly 2 yrs ago and I still haven't gained the same tolerance that I once had. I have no desire to smoke in excess....it just seems like a waste to me. Just a lil bit at a time will keep you stoned all day and your tolerance won't increase much.
Plus your bags will last forever! I can stretch 2 1/2 weeks outta a quater oz of mids.
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"Marijuana may not be addictive, but growing it is" - ED Rosenthal
Maine Caregiver In 100% compliance with Maine state laws.
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ziggystardust
Stranger
Registered: 06/16/09
Posts: 13
Last seen: 15 years, 20 days
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Re: My story: am I ready for weed again? [Re: Farmer Joe]
#379964 - 03/08/10 11:39 AM (15 years, 1 month ago) |
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Thanks to everyone for the supportive replies. I'm going to take your advice, get some indica and start nice and slow. Can't tell you how excited I am with the prospect of being able to smoke again.
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RasJeph
Psycho Pete
Registered: 01/14/09
Posts: 11,657
Loc: Bumfuckt Egypt
Last seen: 1 year, 5 months
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Re: My story: am I ready for weed again? [Re: ziggystardust]
#379971 - 03/08/10 11:45 AM (15 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
ziggystardust said:
Thanks to everyone for the supportive replies. I'm going to take your advice, get some indica and start nice and slow. Can't tell you how excited I am with the prospect of being able to smoke again.
Remember though - don't give up after one try. Give it a few. I think its different, because now that you know HOW to smoke, you're going to get really, really high from minimal amounts. Whereas, when you started smoking, you prolly did it wrong a lot, etc.
Don't let it discourage you if you don't enjoy it right away!
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Of course it's happening inside your head.
Why should that mean it isn't real?
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ChillWillis
old school fool
Registered: 06/14/09
Posts: 2,213
Last seen: 8 years, 3 months
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Re: My story: am I ready for weed again? [Re: ziggystardust]
#379994 - 03/08/10 12:22 PM (15 years, 1 month ago) |
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Ziggy, welcome to our corner of the cannabis culture! I hope among this thread and others you gain all the knowledge you seek. (And then some, at least that's how it worked for me.)
I don't really think I have too much more to offer beyond the advise people have been giving. (Take small incremental dosages and avoid hallucinogens until you've mentally recuperated.)
I get anxiety too, usually when I vape too much too fast and get more than I expected out of the bud.
Sometimes it's hard to turn away from the high school stereotype that you can't be too stoned and I often will dose myself with more than I'd originally planned or wanted. Although it's true that you won't die form being stoned, it is possible to be too stoned for comfort.
When I get into that kind of mood I usually try to tell myself that yes, I'm just having a panic attack and that in 15 minutes I'm going to be fine and looking back on what an ass I made of myself for panicking about nothing. Although it's hard when you feel like your heart is pounding out of your chest it is important to regain control of yourself asap in order do triumph over the anxiety completely some day.
Quote:
SpaceMonkey said:
Strains for anxiety.
Wow, really? I didn't know they actually bred strains to relieve anxiety. I always assumed that it was just a characteristic of all cannabis that was just tossed into the jumble of cures it can provide.. Do you know any specific ones that you'd recommend? I'd love to get some seeds of that shit.
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It's not a war on drugs, it's a war on personal freedom.
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