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PsilocybinMike said:
I would like to delighfully inform all the good people here that I am currently in the midst on an epic MDMA experiences. I have not rolled in roughly 2 years and finally got some suspected pure MDxx rolls. There is a blizzard going here and I did a solo MDMA trip @ home and its been fucking epic.

I been having multiple lengthy and meaningful conversations with people on AIM and shit and I realize that in this state of mind, truly, I am what I would consider to be closer to my "true self" right now. I feel like everything I do and especially the thoughts I form and even my ability to relate those thoughts and translate them in to text for others to read and try to relate to has been amplified dramatically.

Like I said it's been close to 2 years since I've rolled, well a "legitimate" roll experience anyway, and even after 2 years it still remains my favorite substance and seemingly is the substance that amplifies the positive qualities of my personality and makes me realize my own abilities. Most importantly, I am in such a state of mind where I'm not too fucked up to the point where I am basically unable to move and completely locked in to the experience so I'm actually able to describe and translate the experience as it is happening.


Throughout my personal experiences, MDMA has always been that substance for me. It puts me in a state of mind that mirrors my typical mental stage only I feel I am capable of realizng and utilizing my full mental potential. This was always a feeling I've cherished because since I am able to relate this experience while it is still happening as opposed to when I trip and generally once it begins to get intense you are in a state of a "psychedelic nod" and eventually come down enough where you are more or less aware of your surroundings again and have the ability to move and or function.

The significant problem I have alwyways had with those types of experiences, like I'm sure many of you have experienced is that even as you try to recall details of a trip like that even immediately after it happened you find that a "normally" functioning brain (i.e sober) is just simply not even capable to fully and accurately comprehend this type of experience once it has ended. In my own experiences, after my most profound trips I would always attempt to write a trip report or try and write down my experience in some way which would be lengthy accounts attempting to capture in detail my complex and truly mind blowing experiences the best I could. Even at times where I attempted to do this quite soon after the experience each and every time I have never been able to truly capture the experience and translate it in to words in such a way that I find satisfying and also that truly does justice for what I have experienced. As a result I would never end up publishing any of these trip reports.

I remember when I first discovered sites like erowid and bluelight and began reading experience reports about various drugs that I had never done before. It is probably relevant to mention that I was roughly 16-17 when I began using these sites but had been smoking weed daily and essentially been affiliated with the "drug community" in my town I was living in at the time. By that time, before ever using any of these sites or reading any trip reports written by someone else, I had done shrooms and smoked weed regularly and rolled like twice, but hadn't had a legitimate breakthrough experience (by my standards) until probably my 3rd or 4th time.

With that being said..

Once I discovered sites like erowid and bluelight and eventually the shroomery and growery and began reading trip reports and interacting with other people on forums, I quickly noticed many misconceptions I had made in the past in relation to drugs. In general, I have always considered myself a smart and clever person, especially when I was a kid, so in most cases I was actually well informed about most things.

The unique thing about drugs though, which I'm sure applies to most "drug communities" and also most likely applies to most of you and how you got your start with various substances is that the things you learn about drugs are through hearsay. You either hear people talking about possessing or doing a certain drug or describing their experiences from it and form conceptions on these substances based on these things. Beyond that, for most people including myself, legitimate information on drugs, most specifically psychedelics such as LSD, MDMA, Psilocybin, Mescaline and so forth are not readily available to people, especially 13-14 year olds like myself at that time. With this being said the only source of information on these types of things was usually from older kids who had done these drugs. For most people, you start out as a casual then every day pot smoker, and eventually you will be around a discussion related to another type of substance you have never used due to interactions from weed. Based on these tales you hear from people recalling their experiences with various substances, most people are able to gather weather or not based on that specific experience that was described to them, if they would be interested in trying that themself. During my early years of drug dabbling most if not all people I associated with learned about drugs and began doing a particular substance that way.

** Btw I am still writing, I decided to post this first part cuz it is so long that I don't wanna make it all 1 post l0l.

No doubt this seems like a long ass read but hopefully to people that I know are capable of understanding how I feel right now much more than the average friend or family member that has never had breakthrough experiences on this particular drug, I am hoping that you are able to seep through this MDMA enduced rant and truly understand what I am describing and why it is important specifically to all of us on these websites.

PART 2 coming. Btw its 3:27 am here and I popped my 3 rolls together at like 8:45 PM lol and I am still rollin balls. It sucked not being able to get legitimate rolls for 2 years but now that I have waited it has truly made this experience 1 of the most epic rolls of my life.

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